Wednesday, October 28, 2009

What does a woman want?


   This is the question which arises to almost all men in the world. Universally, men feel that it is really difficult to guess the reaction of a woman in different circumstances. Though they are little different from men's thinking, it is not difficult for men to understand what woman wants, if they can understand the basic psychology or if they have basic analyzing capabilities. Precisely, the points brought out below would let men think and get reasons behind her behavior. Of course, there are exceptions where these might not hold good. But, those are rare.


  Woman has a basic character of getting attached to her family, people and things around her. Knowingly or unknowingly, she will develop possessiveness on each and everything around her. She always tries to make things around her better and better, hence she cannot accept things/criticism which let her surrounding down and her enthusiasm in making them better as well.
Tiny Things: She can get upset even for a small piece of talk which is negative about her things. In parallel to this thinking, she expects people whom she love, to support in her activities. For ex: She is interested in keeping her home clean and attractive. She does expect her husband/brother/father to support in these activities. She likes when her husband takes interest in choosing the color of the curtains. She loves when her father gets her things to decorate the house. Similarly, there will be n number of tiny things which she is interested in. She feels happy when men give importance on those. She sometimes feels secured when she is given importance.
Observation/ Remembrance: Women's natural character is to seek attention. She observes a lot and tries to change accordingly. She takes a lot of effort to keep her loved ones happy by changing herself. But, if the change in her is left un-noticed or is not acknowledged, she can easily get upset because she feels that her efforts are not cared. She tries to look beautiful to make her spouse happy and tries lot of things. At the same time she expects her spouse to support / notice those efforts. For ex: She feels happy when her husband observes her dry feet and asks her to take care. She feels happy when he observes the change in nail color or a lipstick. She feels that her spouse cares about her and thus observes her. Lack of observation and acknowledgement might upset her any time leading to her mood swing without any trigger. She expects her close ones to remember special occasions like her birthday, anniversary, first date, friendship day etc and acknowledge/ greet her for her existence. She will be hurt when she knows even the close ones doesn’t remember those. She feels that she is not important and no one cares for her. She feels lonely.
Expression of Love/ Care: Men always fail in expressing their care and love they have towards their wives. They feel it’s unimportant and expect women to understand that they love her. But, ultimately women is again not a fairy or a goddess to understand unspoken/ unexpressed things, though she tries to. It becomes important to show her the love, care for by means of actions. It may me a simple thing like giving a rose, may be a kiss of care, may be a hug, and may be getting her favorite snack. It might be a support/ care given to her when she fails or when she is down. She loves small surprises. It need not be always costly to express love. Of course, costly jewels and clothes brings twinkle in her eyes, but that doesn’t always keep her happy. Tiny things keep her happy as said earlier.
Habits/Attitude/Romance/Conversation: Most of the women quarrel with men for their bad habits. But, there is one other side of women. It is not always true that women cannot accept bad habits. It’s only that she cannot accept when it goes to extremes. She does enjoy manly habits in her spouse when she is confident that it is limited and doesn’t trouble his life. In fact, sometimes she likes the style of men when they smoke. She expects her man to be rough and tough too. She doesn’t like when he is very mild, agrees to whatever she says. She likes him to be aggressive and manly. It appears to be contradictory. But, over a period of time, men can analyze when they can be rough and when they can be mild. She likes her man to be possessive on her. But, not over possessive that it restricts her to be free. She loves freedom at the same time she loves to be under control also. Most women get attracted to a man because of his manliness. Manliness wrt body or may be wrt attitude. Woman feels happy when her beauty is observed and appraised. She expects her man to be romantic, to like her beauty. This is the reason for which she asks about her dressing n number of times. She expects her man to give comments on her dressing. She likes if her spouse gives suggestions on improving on her figure and be beautiful. She thinks that she can keep her man happy by her beauty. Sex does keep her happy as it proves that the man is interested in her. She always feel secured when her man is interested in her.
             Apart from all these, casual conversation with her on any topic will make her feel that she is valued. She likes when people listen to her when she is expressive. It might be really boring for the person who is listening. But, understanding her enthusiasm and interest in being detailed  and listening to her makes her feel she is important, thus making her feel good. Conversations on her interests and disinterests will give her pleasure.


            On a whole, she is happy when she is valued and cared. Though this is a small try to tell what a woman expects/wants, there are many untold things which women want. This is just a try to dissolve them all into major categories. There will be specific example for specific persons. Hope this was helpful for men and supporting for women who are trying to make their relationships better. It would have been a write up on "What men want?" but that isn’t tough as most women know and that is never been a haunting question. Wish you a happy life. Take care.


Smiles,
Meera

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Happiness - Friendship

        They were good friends because of their frequency match in their thinking, principles and attitude. Probably, they did not know they can become best friends. But, they kept their friendship charming by their variety of talks. He had a good opinion, respect on her thinking and the actions. In fact, there were scenarios that he had told his other friends about having such a friend. It was obvious for her to think him as a very good friend due to his thinking and analyzing capabilities. She had very less friends too, whom she can share anything and personal.
         Gradually, the frequency of their talks came down as he became busy with his studies and friends and she had lot of personal problems. They used to meet. But, their talks became formal with usual dialogues like “How are you?” , “Hey, Come home once, we shall have a talk” , “Hi, whats up?” and so on. Though, that did not harm their friendship.
         As the gap increased, he started to hear many things about her. He wondered that why people are talking ill about her. He would not have believed those if her actions would not have supported those. Some of her actions were proofs for people’s talks. He felt really bad for her illogical actions. He, in his mind thought “ I was proud to say that she was my friend. But, I did not think that SHE, SHE would do this.” . He almost lost the respect which he had towards her.
         She was in a victim’s place. Everybody treated her as if she had done a unforgivable mistake. She was left alone. She did not bother what others said as she knew that her actions were right. She kept her lips zipped when others commented. She, in some corner of her mind, was expecting him to come and ask her about what had happened. She was hurt when he avoided her for the same reasons. She , at that instant, could not believe that HE did that to her. She thought, “ God sees the truth, but waits. I know him, he will come back when he comes to know about what had happened.”. She was bold to face everyone, everyday, who did not even spoke to her or turned to her. She waited silently.
         He observed her patience. He realized that she neither tried to give explanations nor tried to talk to him. He thought, “How can a girl be so strong and stubborn?”. He discussed about her with one of his best friends. Amidst the discussion, he felt that he did not even ask her about what had happened. His friend also advised him to talk to her. He started feeling that she would not have done this without any reason. He felt sorry for his behavior of avoiding her instead of being with her when she was down. He decided to speak to her.
        He rushed to her place and asked about what actually had happened. She patiently explained what exactly she was going through. He was sorry for all his behavior. He sincerely told what all he had thought and why he had behaved that way. He told, “Dear, I would have been with you, but I could not, I am sorry. I realized and I have come back to you.”. She was so happy to see her friend back. She could not express her happiness of getting a most valuable friend back after a misunderstanding. She forgot all her grieves by his one statement, “Dear, I have come back”. That day, she thought, “ If a man can leave his ego, come back and be sorry for his action, undoubtedly he is a GEM, and yes, he is my best friend”. She just told, “I knew, you will come” with her eyes filled with tears of happiness.
        We cannot just define what kind of happiness we get out of friendship. Even now, they are good friends with all ups and downs in their life. She thinks he is her best friend and shares everything with him. Hope their friendship remains the same forever.


Smiles,
Meera

Friday, October 16, 2009

A Situation - A Grief


                He was a person who was liked and appreciated by everybody for his cheerfulness, generosity, his pranks and his attitude of making fun of himself and everyone. His attitude never hurt anybody but made everyone happy. He was a good husband and a caring father. His' was a happy lived small family.
                 All his relatives gathered and were leaving for a Puja, a Puja to river Kaveri which was very auspicious for their family. The lady of the family could not join the Puja. She had a genuine reason for it. She wanted her husband to come back soon after the Puja, they had to visit a friend who had come back after a long time. He promised her that he would definitely come soon and take her to her friend's place. They left.
                 All the kids were jumping to get into river Kaveri. But, he stopped them all as he noticed Kaveri roaring with her huge waves. Localites near the banks told that the gates of the dam were opened due to which Kaveri was fully flooded. His 13 year old daughter was too naughty; she was excited to see full flooded Kaveri after years. He warned his daughter strictly not to get into water. She stayed away with a sad face.
                 She was gazing the water when her dad started offering Puja. She was observing the kids of localites who were playing in water. She cribbed about her dad for not allowing her to play in water. After a while, she was confused to see what her dad was trying to do instead of finishing his Puja. She observed, her dad was trying to save a kid who was almost sinking. She felt happy to see her dad being a hero. She was so cool to see her dad doing that, she knew her dad was a great swimmer. But, the relatives were worried. Her dad saved the kid and was about to reach the banks. A huge wave took him away from the banks. He started to flow along with the river. He moved away and away. She was still cool looking at her dad moving away. She was so confident that her dad will swim and come back. Her relatives started shouting about he getting sunk. She saw a scene in which her dad's head was only seen and it was moving far and far from her. Tiny lines of tension appeared on her face. Soon, the localites got the information of the hero lying on the banks near the bridge which is 1 KM away from the place where they offered Puja. All her relatives and localites ran to see him. They forgot about the little daughter. The daughter was able to see her dad after an hour when the localites had placed him in an Auto. The auto driver observed tension on her face and said " Don't worry baby, he is just unconscious. He will be alright." She was so happy to hear that and smiled as if she is relieved from her worries.             
                 She was confused about her uncle who was trying to take her dad back to her home as soon as possible. She also heard people telling words like   " They have got the body, they are taking the body to their hometown". She believed the words of auto driver so much that she shouted at the people telling " Hey, he hasn’t died. He is alive. Don't address my dad as 'Body' ". People left from that place. She wanted to join her relatives, but no one was found. A boy told her that they had left. She was angry on her relatives for leaving her alone there. She was not scared as the place was familiar to her. She rushed to one of their relatives' house near by thinking that everybody will be gathered there. But, nobody was there. A lady told her that everybody left to her hometown. She borrowed some money from that lady and left to her hometown.
                When she was about to reach her place, she found the road of her house crowded. She stopped the auto there and started walking towards her house. She hardly had some space to walk to her home. She heard many things about her dad. She made her way to her home by telling " Please leave me the way, I am his daughter". When she reached, she saw her dad lying on the ground with garlands on him. She saw her mother sitting beside him, with no expressions on her face. She could not believe what had happened. She saw her dad's face. It was as calm as usual. She felt that he was just sleeping. She had an illusion that her dad was still in respiration. But, the environment forced her to believe that her dad was dead. She looked at her mom. Mom uttered , "He had promised that he will come back soon and take me to my friend's place. See, how soon he has come. He is almost 2 hrs early." The whole family got shattered. Little daughter realized that she witnessed her father's death. She was speechless when her mom asked her, " Dear, why did you leave your dad there and came alone?". Mom and daughter became numb, while the relatives were busy with the rituals.
 Both, mom and daughter, could not accept that the hero of their family was dead. They were always in an illusion that he would come back from his long trips that he used go very frequently. They used to feel that he is still alive, along with them, cracking jokes and pulling their legs.
They still feel the same as they used to feel 13 years ago. Yes, it was Oct 16 1996 when they lost the cheerful man. The family wonders if they realize that they have lived 13 years without him till Oct 16 2009. The fact is that they will never realize that he isn't there. They will always feel he is alive in the memories. Mom always tells that her hero has left beautiful memories for her and the years which she lived with him was the most valuable years in her life time.

Rgds,
Meera



Tuesday, October 13, 2009

About me - Family , Friends and Interests

Our's is a small family. Me n my Mom. Of course will become little big after my wedlock with Kish. My mom is my best friend and I can share anything and everything with her.  She is my friend more and mom less. She has given me a lot of freedom to enjoy life. My mom is best of the best.     
 

Kish is a cool dude and has amazing patience to address me and my temper. He is 5 years elder than me, but looks much younger than me. He can make me laugh at any point of time, does'nt  matter how serious I am. I am lucky to have him in my life.
  
Friends are my precious assets. Though I have a big list of friends, I can count my dear ones. I can say that I have the best dudes. Truly caring. Genuinely with me , alwayz. I too care them a lot. Words cannot express the care I have towards them. Thank you for being for me guys.

I like traveling a lot and hence I like driving /riding. We  own a SANTRO XING which is another cool dude of mine. I just enjoy her steering being in my hands. I am crazy abt driving.Kish has a HONDA UNICORN , I also enjoy riding it. I can surely forget all my worries(if any) if I take a ride or a drive. Best chaps other than humans. I lov to be with.


Apart from the craze of driving, I read books(motivational & management), I do craft work,painting, singing, photography and cooking(Thank God!Kish likes my cooking).

What more you wanna know abt me??? Send me the queries ;). 
Take care.

Smiles,
Meera

Monday, October 12, 2009

Welcome

Hi freinds,

Welcome to all of you. I Just thought that I can share all my thoughts, imaginations, experiences with all my friends. At the same time, I wanted to give a try on writing. This is my small world where you can know almost everything about me. So, be there with me.

Smiles,
Meera